PERSONAL RELATION: THE HACK TO GETTING YES

I’ve come to realize that a person’s rise or fall is in the hands of other people. The most successful people understand this. They have learned to serve the interests of the people who matter, and the more closely you align your interests with theirs, the easier it becomes to get what you want from them. The ability to influence people, manage competing interests, and negotiate your way through will shape how far you go in almost anything in life. If there is one skill worth learning above all others, it is the human skill: the art of getting a yes.

That explains why so much attention goes to media, public opinion, and the science of influence. The people with the upper hand are those who shape opinion. Your product or service rarely matters to people as much as the experience they have with you and what they think of you.

As an entrepreneur, this is the one lesson that has stayed with me. My product matters less than the collective perception people hold of it. If I can help people see things from a particular perspective, I can shape the outcome I want, and that applies to almost every area of life.

School never taught us enough about relationships, yet they turn out to be the most important part of life. Everything you need and want will come through people. Whether they hand it over depends on your ability to convince them, persuade them, and help them see why they should. Nobody is coming down from heaven to grant your wishes. Learning to talk to people and negotiate your way through is a skill you have to build deliberately.

Some people have learned to get a yes no matter the conditions in front of them. They are the ones who end up successful because success depends heavily on how others see you and what they think of you.