The Invisible Hands: A Gentle Reflection of How We Think

Today is June 15th, 2025. Father’s Day. Everyone’s status is filled with heart melting messages of praise for dads, throwbacks, and full blown tributes. As usual, I just sat back quietly, letting it all roll by.

Not because I don’t feel anything. But because me being me, I process differently.

Instead of posting, I found myself asking questions. Deep ones. I started wondering: How did I even get here? Like for real, for all the small wins I’ve had and the hard lessons I’ve learned, how much of it is me, and how much of it is where I came from?

I’m proud of my progress, no doubt. I’m proud of my parents too, especially my Dad. But I’ve come to this strange moment of realization: maybe I didn’t make as many decisions myself as I thought. Possibly my so called “free will” has been quietly shaped, nudged, even manipulated by the people and places that raised me.

We like to believe we’re “self made,” that we “think for ourselves,” that we’re “intentional people.” That’s why we resist marketers, advisors, or even well meaning friends trying to tell us what to do. Because at our core, we hate the idea that we’re being influenced.

But here’s the truth bomb: everything about us is influenced, what we like, what we hate, what we chase, even what we dream about. From the music we vibe to, to the kind of people we date, to the business ideas we call “our passion.” All of it? Touched. Shaped. Moulded. By someone or something.

Call it what you like, culture, parenting, religion, trauma, tribe, the internet. I call it the invisible hand.

And I’ve started questioning it. Not because I’m woke or anything (of course I am), but because if I admit I’m constantly influenced, then I must also ask: are those influences helpful, or harmful? Which ones do I need to embrace more, and which ones should I detox from?

On this Father’s Day, I also flipped the lens on myself. If my father’s quiet traits and decisions shaped me this deeply… then what of my own decisions? Who am I unintentionally shaping? My future children? My team? My friends? My followers?

We love to say, “I know what I want.” But do you?

I don’t think you know what you want, not really, until you finally get what you thought you wanted. And even then, if you start chasing the next big thing immediately, did you ever truly want the first thing? Or were you just acting under pressure, chasing a moving target shaped by invisible hands?

The game is rigged. But it’s not hopeless.

It just means we all need to pause and reflect more often. Question your assumptions. Sit with your choices. Audit your influences. Ask yourself if the life you're building is actually yours or just a reaction to what you've seen, heard, or survived.

And if you’re lucky enough to have had someone like a father, present or not, good or not, whose life nudged yours in some way, then maybe honor them not just with a post, but with a little truth:

That we’re all just a patchwork of everyone we’ve met, everywhere we’ve been, and everything we’ve seen.

So yeah. Happy Father's Day.

To them. To us. To the invisible hands guiding us, whether we like it or not.